We all live in a world where love is the most precious virtue or quality that exists and we are all souls full of love. It’s only when we lose access to our inner treasure of love that we starting expecting love from others and begin searching for it outside, from others. We even search from the physical world, which we commonly call flora and fauna. Flora refers to plants around us and fauna refers to animals. It is not wrong to love and be loved by humans and nature. That is not searching for love. Giving love to humans and animals and receiving love from them and also loving plants and nature in general, has existed in the world right from the time the world was a beautiful paradise. That paradise was full of happiness, love and purity. That world is also called the Garden of Eden or Garden of Allah or Swarg or commonly called the Golden Age or heaven.
There is a difference between receiving love and experiencing happiness because of that and searching for it from others. Also, when we make ourselves dependent on this love for remaining happy, it means there is an emptiness inside us. The love that makes us empty instead of filling us and giving us a feeling of fulfillment is a love based on a physical consciousness. On the other hand, a love based on soul consciousness is a love that does not attach itself to the other person so much, so as to bring about sorrow when it is not received or when the love is no longer available to us. This happens when the other person leaves us or stops talking to us or goes away or does not love us anymore for some reason or the other. Loving others without expectations is the love which never gives you any unhappiness at any cost. Loving with desires and fixed demands will make love like a business deal. You give me such and such an emotion or particular word or a certain type of action, which I like and I will give you back what you like. On the other hand, love which does not demand and also love which just exists without the requirement of any fixed conditions to be met is sometimes seen as a love which cannot exist. But it is the love which God is full of. By connecting with Him and seeing each human being as a loveful soul, who is my spiritual brother and a child of God, the ocean of unconditional love; I become a source of giving such a love to others. Also, such a vision for everyone in which love flows to the other person unconditionally because of our eternal relationship of spiritual brotherhood makes life very uncomplicated. In such a relationship you don’t feel tired or pressurized when love is not received and sometimes the other person does not return your love as much as you would like.
People have misunderstood the true meaning of the pure emotion of love and given it an impure form by mixing it with attachment, which always brings sorrow with it. Attachment filled love hurts. This is because it comes with many strings or bondages with it. That is why many relationships where attachment is the foundation, tend to break after the initial phase of the relationship is full of happiness and lots of promises. Very soon, people, because they are not perfect, are not able to reach upto the other person’s level of expectations. Also they are not able to adjust with the other person’s nature and way of thinking and working, whether it is in personal relationships or in professional ones. This is because love is a characteristic which is the key to making any relationship successful and here we are not talking only about relationships involving life partners. Whenever you want to experience joy in a relationship, learn to love with a big heart. This is something we hear commonly, but what this means is loving without any fixed boundaries of how the other person should be with me. In other words, we tend to create so many fixed images in our mind of the other person’s consciousness, attitude, words and actions about how they should be, that we don’t let the other person be themselves. This happens to the extent that the other person will in some cases stop expressing themselves freely. Also sometimes their personality starts going into a cover which has been created by us and they will never come out of that cover for life in some cases. The meaning of that is simple that the other person becomes a puppet in our hands and he or she will do everything that we demand without ever thinking that they are no longer themselves. And who is responsible for that happening? We are. We create a person based on our personality. That’s in short a karma that we become responsible for. This is called a conditional love.
On the other hand, a love that is unconditional wants the other person, whom you love, to be themselves and a different person from them with their own personality, their own special strengths, skills and qualities. This happens in such a way that these qualities and skills complement your strengths and the two of you become a beautiful pair of people who keep each other ahead. Also, at the same time you focus on your own qualities and bring them into action. This is true love. Such a love, when brought into action becomes a beautiful foundation for a happiness filled relationship. In such a relationship, two people enjoy each other’s loveful company without interfering in each other’s personal space.